Waterless holi, Dudhless Shivaratri, Crackerless diwali, Riverless chhath. Wow! wonderful. That’s it right? No.
Now a media house called Quint claims that children carrying water balloons should not be allowed to terrorize people. More Wows.
Well, my sincere request to all the children/people playing Holi.
If you hit them with a balloon also color the faces of these libtards green with a white half moon as a topping. Shout slogans like hamko chahiye azadi. holi maange azadi. balloon mange azadi. These slogans have the JNU mark and hence they are warranty proof. However, if you ask for ISI mark, well it’s there. Look again.
Next day you will be on the Front Page headline saying, “Cute Children showing their FOE”. Take care to use keywords like Dalit balloon, misguided youth balloon, son of a headmaster balloon. If you really want this to work and attract independent patrakars like Ravish Kumar, use Kaun jaat ho balloon. This balloon never fails. However, it remains silent when you want to use this balloon on your own brother. There is the famous remember 2002 balloon discovered by the joint talent of her majesty Barkha Dutt and his excellency Rajdeep Sardesai. There is a special coward and psychopath balloon. It is the result of various hit and trial methods carried out by Mr. Kejriwal in presence of Mr. Kejriwal approved by Mr. Kejriwal in an internal survey also conducted by Mr. Kejriwal. Then we have the yuva balloon which is 46 years old. This balloon is also known by the name of Shahzada balloon and sometimes as pappu balloon. However, there are other efficient ways as well.
For best results use tried and tested methods of stones. And in the process qualifying for the license of the victim card which is one step harder than getting a green card. Or use green colored placards in an attention seeking video. Get a blue tick on your twitter profile in a day. statements from celebrities. Whole day media coverage. From children terrorizing people to poor children coloring themselves in freedom. The benefits of being a liberal are endless. Enjoy.
Happy Holi 🙂